Category: Evolution

CHIMPANZIONISTS

Chimpanzees are mans closest relative, but wheras one is highly evolved and intelligent, human beings are not. Chimpanzees dont have a pharmaceutical industry, taxation, wars to keep an army going, and dont have any twin towers nonsense.

But they are on the verge of changes, senior Chimpz are claiming that new York centralpark was promised to them by god, and they have been moving back to what they claim is the land of their forefathers and killing everything in their wake. As this land is being claimed by senior Chimpz, the closest thing they have to royalty in monkeyland, its being called "Isroyal" and non Chimpanzees are not allowed there.

The chimpz claim that they are gods chosen monkeys and can do as they please, and it is causing concern that they have colllared all the bananna trees, and sell them to the hungry lesser monkeys at huge interest, but its ok because lesser monkeys have no souls and are just Gimoys, or refuse.
The chimpz pray against a large brick wall by banging their heads on it, the prayers are always about how to kill more of the neighbouring monkeys and steal their belongings, they connive and scheme to get the other monkeys to fight among themselves, while they sell them sticks and large stones to hurt their neighbours with, and they use their huge weapons stores called WMDs to threaten neighbouring monkey colonies.

They also say god wants them to cut off the ends of their willies which they do to baby chimpz with a sharp stone, they say god loves them and wants them to destroy the whole world and they have many ideas to achieve this, but strangely this god allowed 6 million of them with the ends cut from their willies to be put into death camps and be made into lampshades and bard of soap, but many say this is just monkeytalk.

David Lambert ex postman from Luton