Well, so much for sophisticated satire. While 90% of you got it, the rest read my eulogy to Shimon Peres as news. Hence this little update. Peres lives, yeah!
I was so ticked at the conniver for trying to fool the Jews that he was going to conduct new Vatican "peace" negotiations, while passing the responsibility for the fraud to his goon Uri Savir, that I was going to fool him back:
Talks have recently been underway to arrange a summit meeting in Rome this
April between President Shimon Peres and Palestinian Authority President
Mahmoud Abbas. The person behind the summit drive is Uri Savir, president of the Peres
Center for Peace, who was one of the architects of the Oslo accords and
served as director general of the Foreign Ministry when Peres was foreign
minister. Savir has been trying to arrange the summit for months now.
I spent days of fury debating the death satire and decided to go with it because my readers will get the irony, new readers will be unfamiliar with my pixie sense of humor and will be drawn in enough to read about Peres' latest deadly trick against Israel, and best of all, if it caught on, Peres will know that when he goes, he will not be remembered by everyone as a statesman but for the murderous cretin he actually was. (Save the "eulogy" and send it out widely when he finally goes down under.)
And while I somewhat overestimated all my readers' appreciation of the weapon of satire, those who got it, responded well. Take a gander at two responses from Israel National Radio
(Arutz Sheva) personalities.
What a headline to catch readers. Excellent idea. But now that you guessed what will be, they have to think of another plan.
Bet El Institutions & Arutz Sheva
He got it, while broadcaster Tamar Yonah didn't but look what she sent verifying my prescience:
Hi Barry, I thought you would like to see this email I got.
Hope you are doing well. By the way, I didn't understand the 'Peres killed' email you sent out.
Newly discovered footage of a terrorist attack perpetrated by an Israel Defense Forces soldier in the Arab town of Shfaram five years ago indicates that authorities were aware of plans to commit the attack, a lawyer representing Israeli Arabs suspected of taking part in the subsequent lynching of the gunman said Sunday.
In August 2005, Eden Natan-Zada opened fire in a passenger bus in Shfaram with his army-issued M-16 assault rifle, killing four. Immediately following the attack, a large crowd gathered around the bus, surrounding the gunman and beating him to death.
Last year, prosecutors charged 12 individuals with taking part in the lynching of Natan-Zada, a move that ignited criticism from the Israeli-Arab community.
An attorney representing some of the lynch suspects recently became aware of the existence of the aerial footage which was taken moments before, during and after the attack.
The lawyer, Maher Talhami, said the cameras followed the trail of the bus in which Natan-Zada rode in entering Shfaram. Immediately after the attack, the footage shows angry mobs gathering at the scene.
Talhami argues that the camera's focus on the bus suggests that authorities were aware of the impending attack. The lawyer obtained the footage while combing through the evidence gathered in the case.
According to Talhami, the unmanned aerial vehicle flew at an altitude of three kilometers over the town and was filming just as Natan-Zada's bus entered Shfaram.
The footage shows the bus until the moment of the attack, which took place at 5:22 P.M. Police helicopters then hovered over the scene of the attack and continued filming.
Talhami said the timing of the filming indicates that defense officials knew of Natan-Zada's plan to perpetrate the attack.
"We are talking about video shot by a drone," Talhami said. "Obviously not every private individual or civilian agent operates a drone on his own volition."
"The method of surveillance of the bus proves that there was early information available to the defense establishment," Talhami said.
NOW WE RECALL WHAT I WROTE:
ANOTHER WITHDRAWAL, ANOTHER SHABAK MASSACRE
by Barry Chamish
Barely a week ago I addressed the people of Neve Dekalim in Gush Katif and promised them that just before the pullout there would be a massacre perpetrated by the Shabak. I used the example of the Hebron pullout to make my point.
Back in '97, PM Netanyahu couldn't get his Hebron withdrawal past his cabinet. The next day, an IDF soldier, Noam Friedman, who had just spent 3 months in a psychiatric ward, took a bus to Hebron and shot up the Arab market in front of numerous television cameras which happened to be there as well. Due to international pressure, the withdrawal was passed by the cabinet that evening.
And I also told the gathered that the outrage would come from Kach, since the Shabak runs the organization. It is no coincidence that a few days before, Kach members publicly staged a Pulsa Dinura, death curse ceremony against Ariel Sharon. That trick was played one month before Rabin's murder by Kach members led by one Avigdor Eskin.
So, surprise, surprise, the Shabak aided by IDF intelligence pulled the old rabbit out of its hat just when they were supposed to. As usual, the patsy was Yemenite.
Here are the predictable details:
A Jewish soldier who went AWOL from the IDF one month ago killed four people and wounded 12 others when he opened fire inside a bus in an Arab town in the Galilee.
Angry residents lynched the 19-year-old following the shooting. He was identified as Eden Natan Zada from Rishon L'tzion, a city south of Tel Aviv. Israeli media reported that he recently moved to the Kfar Tapuach community in northeast Samaria after turning to religion and becoming involved in extreme political activism, but the administrator of the community said he never heard of the man.
The killer's parents, worried over their son's radical change, said they had asked the army to take away their son's weapon but were told by officers there was no need to do so.
Israel media tried to link the murder with anti-expulsion protests and pointed out that the murderer had refused to take part in the planned expulsion. Former MK Rabbi Chanan Porat told questioning interviewers there is absolutely no connection to be made between the anti-expulsion protests and the murder.
Many questions remained unanswered following the murder, which occurred shortly before 6 p.m., particularly concerning events immediately after the shooting. Police approached the bus in the town of Shafarm after the shooting and removed an angry mob from the bus and reportedly tried to protect the vehicle from hundreds of angry Arab residents. Five officers were injured as the mob pelted them with stones and bottles. Several people got past police, but it was not clear whether the shooter was killed following the police intervention or whether he died from the initial mob attack.
Zada was in an IDF unit other than the Border Police and it is not known how or why he obtained the Border Police uniforms.
MK Uri Ariel (National Union) said the IDF must investigate why the murderer had his weapon with him after having been on AWOL for an extended period of time.
Prime Minister Ariel Sharon said, "This was a reprehensible act by a bloodthirsty Jewish terrorist who sought to attack innocent Israeli citizens.... I send condolences to the families of those who were murdered and my best wishes for a quick recovery to those who were wounded. The entire State of Israel, regardless of race, religion or sex, strongly condemns this act of terrorism."
Once again, the sociopath Sharon had four Arabs killed and 16 others shot just to get his little Gaza withdrawal done. The shooter was another in a long line of Shabak patsies which includes Yigal Amir and Baruch Goldstein. And, as always, the "leaders" of the Right and the religious communities cower in shame over the incident. None dare actually blame the real perpetrators, the government of Israel and its internal security apparatus.
Recall what I wrote in my "parody" of Peres' murder:
Israel's second Prime Minister, Moshe Sharrett, swore he would tear his clothes and "go into mourning" if Peres ever entered politics. That was because, at the time in the early 50s, Peres was Director of Israel's Atomic Energy Commission. In his worst of many crimes, he sacrificed the lives some 10,000 Sephardic, mostly Yemenite and Moroccan children, in ghastly atomic experiments, in exchange for American nuclear bomb plans. The horrid details are in the film: The Ringworm Children,
And let us all thank another reader who wrote:
Your email about the demise of Peres almost had me believing that it was true, but then reality set in, sigh . . . . . .
Its not easy to find the complete movie The Ringword Children - Mass Radiation Poisoning of Sephardic Jews, yet it is possible to view it in five, 10 minute segments at Youtube:
Perhaps your readers would like these links:
Right now Israel is being pushed into war by the Council On Foreign Relations (CFR) through the likes of George Mitchell, William Burns and their CFR publicists Thomas Freidman, Richard Cohen et al. And while the CFR pushes Israel into the flames, Peres exploits the situation by making it look like the Vatican is pulling the nation out. Watch for a "peace plan" from Rome soon.
The situation is ugly and becoming deadly. Yet oddly, only my readers have the program to sort out the actors. I can only say, sorry, the worst of the performers, Shimon Peres, still lives.